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Syahidah Hashim
20
MDIS - BA in International Travel & Hospitality Management
Yishun, Singapore

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Monday, March 20, 2006

i feel like im goin thru a very emotional period in my life.
i feel so lost in everything i do.
sumtimes i just wished everyone wud just disappear.
i just dunt want to ans ani quests from anione.
im not myself lately.
ive been pretty down lately.
i laugh but i dont really wanna laugh.
everything seems so lifeless.
life suddenly feels so meaningless.

ive been hoping n wanting to have sumone like him*.
n ive found him.
not exactly but the quality is dere.
i do hope we cn last long.
my love fer u is genuine n sincere.
i know dat we have so many obstacles to overcome.
but i wanna tell u dat im here fer u and ill always understand u.
ive nvr been in a situation like this,
but i swear ill try to understand u.
i do love u, n i hope u'll try to change fer me..

im gettin more distant from my parents.
altho i do live in da same roof as dem.
im in my room almost all the time.
i try as much as possible to avoid them.
i dont want to talk at them.
i dont want to even look at dem.

i was in da car on the way back frm fetching my mom,
my dad was telling my mum abt kak sue quitting he job.
and dey were talking n just commenting on it.
dey kept saying she was giving excuses and wad not.
in my mind, y da hell sud dey even care.
it's her life..
if she wants to quit den it's her decision.
dey must b sum probs in her werk dat makes her wanna quit the job.
y da hell must u say such stuffs abt her?
personally, everyone is different..
i myself believe dat if im not happy in doin sumthing,
i dont wanna do it. ill rather pursue in sumthing dat i want to do n excel in it.
isnt dat wad's life is all abt.
finding ur own dreams n werking towards it.
n bein happy.
wad's ambition den?

im starting to lose my interest in knowing ppl
n bein on da phone 24/7.
i wanna start goin fer interviews again.
i want a job.
i need da money.
n i do need to focus on sumthing.

to rozesky, u're just not da one.
i dunt really wanna be seen wid u.
i dont even wanna talk to ppl abt u.
i feel ashamed.
i just dunt like ur character n how u do things.
i cant b wid u.
our personalities crash.
im sorry, but im just doin' wad my heart is telling me to do.
before sumone gets hurt, let's just leave each other.
n onli start to contact when dere is a need.
i know it wudnt b dat simple to b just frens,
coz' da feeling wud still b dere.
might as well i distant myself from u,
so dat we can continue wid our lives n u can continue in ur pursue to find da one.


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