it's been a week since i posted my last entry.
i apologized.
it's just that ive been busy with school n work.
yes people, im working.
and it's only been 2 days of werking and im already so worn out.
the tired journeys from home-work/home-sch-work,
leaves me no time to actually catch up on my studies.
i tried to revise on the train
BUT i find myself people-watching and day-dreaming
rather than studying.
the book is open for show, but no actual reading or revision is actually done.
pathetic, yes.
it's already day 2 and im already dragging myself to work.
the endless calls to unknown strangers.
the same script over&over again.
the endless rejections.
and also the never-ending pressure.
shit! i just cant take it!
i dont think im cut out to be a telemarketer.
also, im not doing well socially.
i tried to make friends,
but i guess making friends in the adult world isnt as easy as making friends when u were younger, were they?
i guess, it will take awhile.
but i cant wait for that, ive got better, more important things to do.
i guess, i will have to let go of this job
and rely on home tuitions more.
i feel like im just not fated/destined/meant to be werking under someone.
laugh at me for being spoilt.
but i would much rather be my own boss.
study-wise,
i feel like i need to put in more focus to my studies.
now that im gonna start doing my very first assignment.
and this will contribute in the total final marks.
yes, the marks for this will play a part in
wheather or not i get my adv. diploma.
and i dont just plan to get a pass.
if possible i would like to aim as high as a Distinction.
i figured that all i need is to concentrate and put more effort in my studies.
and also, to do more research.
today, Mr. Lawrence was questioning me abt my attendence.
i guess he never expected me to pon class so often.
all i afford to say was sorry.
but i guess, the sorry wasnt enough.
i feel like i needed to show him that im serious abt this course
n serious abt doing well.
i think that he may already have a bad impresssion on me.
in today's class, i listened to almost every werd that he said.
and i could get the points faster than on most days.
which means, i wasnt blur/day-dreaming etc etc.
and i thought that i would HATE ecotourism and that i would not do well in this module.
but after Mr.Lawrence had gone through the introduction and chap 1,
i began to understand the text itself and was actually interested in the module.
i guess in studying,
u always have to understand in order to enjoy studying the subject/module.
physically wise:
family members had commented on my body.
they said that ive shrink a lil.
ouhk, this happens to be one of the reason y im feelin happy.
arent u happy when someone commented on how good u look.
ouhk, but still, im still unhappy with the way i look.
some parts of my body still are big.
here a few things that i want to have further shrinking.
i hate my big cheeks, i wish they were smaller.
i hate my boobs, i want them to be smaller but not too small coz' i still want my assets.
i hate my abdomenent, there's still a small bicycle tyre
p.s: it used to be car tyre den it shirk into motor tyre,
now it's a bicycle tire.
i hate my arms, it's still big in circumference.
i hate my ass, too big.
i want smaller ass but not too small.
i hate my thighs, too big.
i want smaller thighs pls.
lastly, i want smaller calfs.
even though they're small, i still think there too big fer a girl.
ouhk, so i guess i have......
almost the whole body to shrink down even further.
haha. overall, im not happy with my all the parts in my body.
went out with Tino today.
met him after sch.
i pon work today also.
so, we were having this relationship counselling session.
he needed my advice and help.
so, i was prepared to help la.
eh, i give good advices&tips k
BUT the problem is,
i myself m not scoring in my own relationship.
hahaha.
i dont know y?
but suddenly im feeling very uneasy.
it almost feels like i have a whole lot of problem waiting ahead of me.
argh! head feels so damn heavy.
p.s: do any one of u know how to remove cellulite naturally?